Love recognizes no barriers. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences, penetrates walls to arrive at it destination full of hope. – Maya Angelou
Many people are surprised about my “sudden” decision of leaving my motherland, family and friends to be reunited with my fiance’. I have to admit that sometimes, I do feel bad that it seems to people that it was an easy decision. Some people may think I decided so quickly just because I think that I have found the love of my life. Maybe some people also think that I need to be here because I need the money.
Well, too bad for them — I did have a good regular job and a nice life in the Philippines. I can get my manicure and pedicure every week or even more than once a week when I want to. In the Philippines, I don’t have to do housework even if I want to. As soon as I pile up the dishes and get ready to wash them, my cousins will take the chore out of my hands.
I wouldn’t say I grew up in a rich family. But I will never say that we were or are hard-up. My parents do not go to international holidays once a year not because they cannot afford it but because they choose to send other kids to school than go on holidays. That much I can say about what kind of life we have.
So, why am I here? Why do I have to do the moving? Why couldn’t HE be moving? I never thought that that would even be a question. But it is a qualified question after all. I don’t think I ever was able to answer that question. Even to myself. I mean, does it need to be verbalized? I just met the love of my life!
I thought I’ve been in love before. But it’s different when you know that you are with THE person who loves you and wants to be with you just as much (or even more) as you love him and want to be with him. Falling in love with Mark and wanting to be with him — that’s the kind of certainty that comes but once in a lifetime. Meeting someone who seems to have known you all your life and vice-versa, even if you grew up in different civilizations — that’s something that some people don’t even get to experience even once in their lifetime.
Many people still laugh (some are surprised) when I say that I prayed for Mark and that he fits my description to God to a ‘T’. But it’s true. He is one of those answered prayers that you wouldn’t have thought God will really give you. You sometimes think to yourself, “I must have done something REALLY good to deserve this”. So while it is difficult to be away from my family, I have to make this decision. It’s one of those wonderful events in your life that’s thrown at your feet and you cannot take too long to take it and thank the universe for it.
Sometimes, I do feel guilty that I’m here. When I’m happy and enjoying my life away from the parents who raised me and my brother and sister who I grew up with and might still need an “ate” to guide them or treat them to movies. Just because I’m in love. But if you risk your life for work, why not try a different life for love?
No one can ever replace my family in my heart or the friends I’ve known all my life in the Philippines. You don’t just build a friendship in a day. I still have friends way back in elementary. The friends who I attended school together with, played siyato and piko with. So people who think this was an easy decision for me certainly do not know what they’re talking about.
But I do have a commitment to my life. I do have a commitment to live and grow a soul in this life. And growing a soul means not just staying in the comfort zone created by family and friends but creating your own. I have a commitment to make a life out of my life. Sounds complicated, but I’m sure, you get what I mean.
So why am I here? I can never say it as good as it was said in a movie: “When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.” #
Hi Chared! What you wrote in your blog is soooo true! Once you meet ‘The One’, there’s no holding back. Leaving your family in the Philippines is hard, but you have to follow your heart and start discovering the path towards your future. It’s not that life would be so much better if you marry a foreigner (a typical filipino mentality…don’t get me wrong, I get that all the time specially since my husband is a bit older than me). Anyway, it’s just that your stars are aligned for you towards another person from another country. It’s not easy living in a place with a different culture from ours; where you get to do everything. There are no more kasam-bahay to help you out, no more easy access to pampering your self and the works. It’s a totally different world out here. But it’s all good. Isn’t it ironic? We were seatmates in high school and we have taken similar paths towards the family life. Well, good luck to you my friend. Follow the path towards your star.
Posted by: Emy | September 22, 2007 08:05 AM